Closet confidential: Denise Restauri
The writer and artist on how she's translating east coast style to the west coast — and the most meaningful pieces in her closet
Describing someone as a multi-hyphenate can feel a bit trite, but Denise Restauri truly is one. A founder-storyteller-podcast host-public speaker-artist, she is the architect and former executive producer of the inaugural Forbes Women’s Summit; the founder of GirlQuake, an organization that amplifies women’s voices; and a close friend of Jake and Jones. In 2021, she moved with her husband, the media executive Lewis DVorkin, to Santa Barbara. She spoke to Picnic about her approach to style, the most meaningful pieces in her closet, and her single biggest aesthetic challenge in transitioning to Southern California.
I never thought we would leave New York. We had built-ins in our closets! We were the east coasters who would visit California and proudly tell whoever would listen: “We are from New York,” (as if they couldn't tell). Then one day, Lewis and I were at the Montauk farmer's market. My big decision for the day was whether I should get sea salt with or without lemon. Lewis' phone rang — there was a job in California. My first thought was, 'Wait, where?' Then: “Call the movers and book plane tickets.” Now we say, “We're from New York and we're never leaving Santa Barbara.” Our life has been like that: one big, wonderful adventure.
My style shifted radically when I moved from the east coast. In New York, I had it down. If I was going to an event, I was dressed up, I was in heels. Then I moved to Santa Barbara, and nobody knew me. At first, it was great, I’d throw on something in the morning without thinking too much about it, and people would stop me to compliment any old thing I was wearing. Then I started to meet people and I got intimidated. They really knew California style. What I’ve discovered over the past three years is that when I try to be them — those are my biggest mistakes. I’m so much better when I’m authentically me.
My biggest fashion dilemma has been flats. In New York, I lived in high heels. I used to walk from Midtown to Uptown in those five inch Louboutins. People would be like, ‘How do you do that?!’ and I’d be like, ‘What a wimp. How do you not?!’ Now I’m 70 years old and I totally get it!
You’re Denise Restauri
In 2017, I was interviewing the French chef Dominique Crenn for a Forbes event. Earlier that day, I’d been wearing a camo jacket by one of my favorite designers, Nili Lotan, with jeans and a t-shirt. When it was time for the event, I changed into five-inch heels and a Rick Owens skirt — basically a full work outfit. Dominique came into the room and wearing the jacket I had on earlier that day, plus jeans, a vintage shirt, and sneakers. She was tremendously cool — just so, so French, and the only female chef in the United States to have three Michelin stars. I was jealous! We ended up going for a drink later that evening and got to talking — there was another event the next day, and Dominique was speaking on stage. She asked what sneakers I was going to wear, and I laughed and said, “I can’t wear sneakers. You can wear whatever you want — you’re Dominique Crenn. But not me.” And she looked at me and said, “So what — you’re Denise Restauri.” Those words changed my life. I realized I was giving her so much power that I wasn’t giving myself. Your power isn’t what you do, it’s who you are. Dominique was just being herself, and that’s what made her so cool.
Dress for Success
Another time, I interviewed the CEO of Dress for Success, a non-profit that helps women get jobs. It’s a full service, from helping women fine-tune their resumes to giving them clothes to wear to interviews. The day of the interview, I got in the elevator with a young woman who looked like the world had just collapsed on her shoulders. She just looked so dejected. Later that day, I was leaving, and the same woman was there in the elevator, except this time she had a big smile on her face. She was carrying a suit to wear the next day, and talking to her mom on the phone, saying, “Mom, I’m going to nail this interview tomorrow.” I realized what we wear projects to the world who we are. And it works both ways — how we feel about ourselves, and who we project ourselves to be with others.
The Coat
This coat is one of the most meaningful pieces I own. It belonged to my mom. The photo on the right was taken in New York in 2009. My mom was visiting from Pittsburgh. She loved this coat. I had a vintage version, and I threw it on so we could be twins. I treasure this photo — it’s so filled with love.
She died in 2020 at 93 years old. For years she would tell me to take her coat because she wanted me to have it. As much as I wanted it and of all the memories that came with it (I love my mom so, so much) I wanted her to look in her closet and feel the joy and memories herself. I now own it. It’s not that practical for Santa Barbara but I will never get rid of it because it’s so much bigger than a coat — it’s my mom. It brings tears, the good kind, to tell this story.
An Inauguration Gown
I got this Pamela Dennis dress at Harriet Kassman (RIP) in DC, to wear to Bill Clinton’s 1993 inauguration. While I was at the store, [CBS broadcast journalist] Paula Zahn came in to interview women who were buying dresses — so I ended up on CBS in this dress. I'll never forget the question she asked me: “How did you pick this dress?” My answer: “I feel like a princess in it.” (I felt like Grace Kelly). And I did feel like a princess that night — the fabric, the way it felt. Trying it on now, 21 years later, with no makeup, barefoot, my hair uncombed, I still love the way this dress makes me feel — like a fairy tale.
A Respectable Bride
This Oscar de la Renta was my wedding dress to Lewis 19 years ago. My daughter was in seventh grade, and I was so worried about being a “respectable” bride. I didn't want to be too sexy. Crazy, but true! And it was my second marriage, so I thought I couldn't wear white, which is silly, in retrospect.
I was influenced by Sarah Jessica Parker because she is petite like me (I'm 5'3") and she wore a lot of Oscar. She helped me see that I could wear volume. We box ourselves into thinking we can't wear something because of our height or weight. Sometimes we just need to be inspired and run the experiment — the discoveries are freeing.
A Tailored Suit
I got rid of all my work stuff when we moved, because I’m not in that life anymore. But I kept this suit for two reasons. One, it just makes me smile. And two, I don’t weigh myself, so every so often I’ll try on the pants and while they don’t fit like they used to, I can still get them on, so that’s nice.
I got this in my designer era. I wore Prada, Gucci, and Jil Sander. Those were my go-to’s. Everything was very tailored, and those brands fit my lifestyle.
I am constantly purging my closet. Over the past three years, I’ve sold or donated so much of my New York wardrobe. It was weighing me down — I would look in my closet and see two different people, the old me and the new me. I have kept my favorite pieces — the ones connected to memories that make me smile — but freeing myself of all that extra stuff allows me to live in the present and discover a whole new side of myself.
I no longer buy for a name, other than the quality. Free City is one of my go-to brands now — I love their sweats, I love their pants. I’m not really a sneaker girl, although I do wear them now, because I walk a lot. So, joggers work well because they’re baggy but come in at the bottom.
And of course, I love my Jake and Jones finds. It was one of the first stores I discovered when I moved here — it helped me find my west coast style without totally giving up my inner east coast girl (I’m not ready to go full-on boho!)
When I met Jen, the owner, I told her that I gave up my corporate NYC world and was rediscovering my inner artist, focusing on textiles and knitting. She invited me to sell my hand-made hats and vests in the store. I love creating one-of-a-kind pieces for Jake and Jones. It's so much bigger than selling the things I make, it's about being a part of the Jake and Jones (and that really means Santa Barbara) community. Priceless.
The Jewelry Stack
I’m drawn to simplicity, in clothes. I think of clothes as the canvas and jewelry as the painting. There’s a store in New York called Pachute, meaning ‘simple’ in Hebrew. Sharone Perry-Komoroff is the owner. I walked into the store one day, and back then it was tiny, half the size of my bedroom. Sharone had this mask necklace on. She’s beautiful, she could wear a sack and make it look great. At the time, I wasn’t wearing much jewelry because I traveled so much for work and stacking pieces wasn’t really a thing. But I went back a couple days later and got the mask. Sharone and I became friends. Years later, when I was leaving New York, I saw her wearing this “S” necklace. She’d inherited it from her mother-in-law who got it from a friend. People kept stopping her to ask about it, so she started making it for the store. I got it. These are my bookend necklaces — my beginning in New York, and my end. Every time I put them on, I think of Sharone and smile. That's what it's all about — the things we have, making us smile.
As told to Zoë Schiffer, August 2024.
Let’s chat
Have a style question you want us to answer next week? A thought sparked by this week’s interview? Feedback about what you want to read next? Email zoe@jakeandjones.com.
Beautiful stories and pieces, Denise! Thank you for sharing them with us. So happy to know you xo
Denise has all the best stories… real, relevant and rewarding. And her multiple audiences love each and everyone of them!